You know those moments when you spiral over one small mistake? Or when you assume the worst before anything even happens? That’s not just anxiety talking — it might be your brain playing tricks on you. These mental tricks have a name: cognitive distortions. And they could be the reason you feel stuck, overwhelmed, or constantly self-critical.
Let’s talk about them. Let’s unpack what they are, how they sneak into your mind, and — most importantly — how you can take their power away.
What Are Cognitive Distortions?
Cognitive distortions are simply patterns of thinking that twist reality. They’re not facts. They’re not truths. But they feel real. That’s why they’re so dangerous.
They’re like wearing a filter over your eyes — one that makes everything look a little darker, a little scarier, a little more personal than it actually is. And if you’re not aware of them, they can completely change how you see yourself, others, and the world around you.
Why Do We Fall Into These Mental Traps?
Believe it or not, your brain isn’t trying to sabotage you. It’s trying to protect you.
Cognitive distortions are usually born from past experiences — a bad relationship, trauma, criticism, childhood messaging, or even society’s expectations. Your brain develops shortcuts to keep you alert, to avoid pain, to prepare for danger. But in doing so, it sometimes goes overboard and starts seeing threats where there are none.
That’s where the distortions begin.
Common Cognitive Distortions (And How They Sound in Your Head)
Let’s walk through a few of the most common ones. You’ll probably recognize more than one.
- All-or-Nothing Thinking
“If I don’t do this perfectly, I’ve completely failed.”
Life isn’t black or white. But your brain convinces you it is. Either you win or you’re worthless. No in-between. - Overgeneralization
“I got rejected once. I’ll never find love.”
One bad experience becomes a pattern in your mind — even if it’s just a single data point. - Mental Filtering
“Everyone said the presentation was great… except that one person who didn’t clap.”
You could have 99% positivity, but your brain zooms in on the 1% negativity. - Discounting the Positive
“They’re just being nice. They don’t really mean it.”
You undermine compliments, successes, and good moments. You convince yourself they don’t count. - Catastrophizing
“What if I fail? What if I lose everything? What if this ruins my life?”
You jump to the worst possible outcome — even when there’s no reason to. - Emotional Reasoning
“I feel anxious, so something bad must be about to happen.”
Your emotions become your evidence, regardless of the facts. - Personalization and Blame
“They’re upset — it must be because of me.”
You take responsibility for everything, even things that have nothing to do with you.
How These Thought Errors Shape Your Life
You don’t need to have a mental illness to struggle with cognitive distortions. These patterns affect everyone. But when they go unchecked, they can lead to chronic anxiety, low self-esteem, perfectionism, people-pleasing, burnout, and even depression.
Imagine going through life constantly convinced that:
- You’re not good enough.
- Everything will fall apart.
- People secretly dislike you.
- You’re a failure unless you’re perfect.
That’s not just exhausting — it’s paralyzing.
So, How Do You Fix It?
You don’t have to “fix your brain.” It’s not broken. What you can do is train your mind to recognize distortions and reframe them.
Here’s how:
- Start by Noticing
Awareness is everything. You can’t change what you don’t notice. Start tuning in. When you feel anxious, ashamed, or down — pause and ask, “What am I telling myself right now?” - Name the Distortion
Once you catch the thought, try to label it. “Oh, that’s all-or-nothing thinking.”
Giving it a name makes it feel less like truth and more like a habit. - Challenge the Thought
Ask yourself:- Is this really true?
- What’s the evidence for and against this thought?
- What would I tell a friend who said this about themselves?
- Reframe It
Don’t fake positivity. Just find a more balanced, truthful thought.
“This isn’t perfect, but it’s still a solid effort.”
“I made a mistake — but that doesn’t mean I’m a failure.” - Practice Daily
You won’t get it right every time. That’s okay. But each time you catch and reframe a distortion, you build a stronger, healthier mental habit. Over time, your mind starts to work for you, not against you.
Final Thoughts
Cognitive distortions are sneaky. They don’t announce themselves — they whisper. They hide behind feelings and fears and internal narratives that sound familiar. But once you spot them, you take back control.
You’re not your thoughts. You’re the one hearing your thoughts. And you get to decide which ones deserve your attention.
So the next time your brain starts spiraling or dragging you down, take a deep breath and ask, “Is this a distortion?”
Chances are — it is. And you’re allowed to rewrite the script.